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大哥搂得我好紧,我又是笑着的。但我们本来就是感情好的兄弟啊,这样亲昵举动算正常的吧,魏翔何必那么震惊。草莓遗留的心情在发酵,大哥或许刚刚洗了澡,他身上肥皂的味道让我觉得好香。&ldo;你的脸怎么这么红?&rdo;什么都不知道的大哥疑惑地问着。&ldo;天气热吧!&rdo;我回答他。进到尾里坐在藤椅上,大哥开了电风扇。老旧的风扇喀哒喀哒地左右转着,水泥地上吹起沙子。风有些凉,我卸下了连日的紧绷,心情愉快。魏翔带着奈奈走进屋里来,奈奈冲向前去打开电视,转转转地转到nhk的新闻台。&ldo;你们不是在外面玩吗?&rdo;看着魏翔一脸大便地往我身旁坐下来,我问。&ldo;奈奈说要看电视。&rdo;大哥从冰箱里拿出盘切好的水梨,&ldo;我时间快到了,先进去换衣服。&rdo;他跟着回到自己的房间里去。&ldo;奈奈是妳要看电视吗?&rdo;我问着女儿。&ldo;哥哥问我要不要进来看电视啊!&rdo;奈奈用天真的语气说着,不知道自己被她老爸套出了话。&ldo;哦──&rdo;我斜眼看了魏翔一眼。他紧抿着双唇,因为谎言被识破而无话可说。等大哥换好衣服开车出门上班后,我往屋里的房间走去,魏翔很自然地跟在我身后。我们走进大哥的房间,留奈奈自己一个人在外头看电视。&ldo;你和丰哥感情真的很好。&rdo;魏翔先开口。&ldo;他一直都很照顾我。&rdo;我没忘记过。&ldo;我也一直都……&rdo;魏翔的头有些低,悲伤的神情被过长的浏海隐藏在底下。&ldo;你对我也很好,但是你跟大哥不同。&rdo;亲情和爱情不同,对亲情我能自然付出,爱情却让我却步。魏翔是个男人,他是我却步的原因。&ldo;是不是我对你还不够好,如果你有不喜欢我的地方,可以直接跟我说。我会改的,真的。&rdo;他认真地说。&ldo;你没有不好的地方。&rdo;我老实地告诉他:&ldo;相反的,你对我太好了。你一点都不懂得保护自己,爱情绝对不能这样全心全意付出,像你这样,如果我又走了,那你该怎么办?&rdo;&ldo;我会跟你走。&rdo;&ldo;笨蛋,如果我不让你跟呢?&rdo;他又抿紧了嘴唇,用力得唇色都发白。&ldo;你认识的是以前的我,那个我和现在的我不一样。我知道这样对你说有些残忍,但是我早就把过去的事情忘光光,我不记得你,所以对你少了那种感觉。我并不认为你是个可以爱上的对象,即便你真的对我很好。我只是个普通人,还带了个女儿,假如真的和你在一起,那光想到以后要怎么跟奈奈解释我们的关系,我就冷掉了。&rdo;我打算在这里将问题摊开来,像大哥说的,再拖下去只会更难办。&ldo;以前的你跟现在的你没有什么不同,你还是我认识的那个人。&rdo;魏翔吸了吸鼻子,或许是他听出了我语气中半拒绝的意味。他喃喃念着:&ldo;你只是忘记了我而已,这没什么关系,总有一天你会想起来。一定会的。&rdo;&ldo;为什么非要我不可?街上那么多男人,比我好而且单身又不麻烦的多的是。干嘛偏偏看上我这种脑袋有问题、结过婚、还有小孩的人?&rdo;我问。&ldo;你到底喜欢上我哪点?&rdo;&ldo;每一点都喜欢。&rdo;他说话的声音已经在颤抖。&ldo;你喜欢的应该是以前那个阿满。&rdo;我这么以为。他喜欢的是那个懦弱、神经质、动不动就激动得掉眼泪、无法自己一个人活下去的人格分裂患者。有些人会喜欢脆弱的东西,因为那会激起他们的保护欲,魏翔说不定就是因为这样才爱上以前那个我。&ldo;我喜欢的是你。&rdo;他抬起头来看我,黑色的眼眸里有着浓郁深沉的悲伤。他的脸痛苦得几乎要扭曲了,苍白的嘴唇发颤着,说出的话像是控诉。&ldo;我知道你也喜欢我,但是你一直不肯承认。就像以前一样,不论接吻或做爱,你总是不停否认自己的感觉,不承认你爱我。&rdo;&ldo;我、没、有。&rdo;寒着张脸,我反驳他的指控。&ldo;忘记并不代表事实没发生过,你总是在逃避我,喜欢男人真的那么丢脸吗?&rdo;他声音不大,也不暴跳如雷地对我发脾气,只是静静地说着,但那些言语却真实地闯入我胸口,刺痛我的心。
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