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  然后,他在赵黄昏刚刚药检取样完,坐在候场室拿球拍试手感的时候。

  偷偷换掉了他的那瓶水。

  那场比赛赵黄昏拼尽了权力,他拿到了金牌,他看着华国的国旗缓缓升向最高处,他被所有人欢呼着举到空中。

  他在赛后悄悄牵起了教练的手。

  一切就如同让人头脑胀的梦境一般。

  “127号赵-黄-昏,司坦唑醇测试成阳性反应,确认服用了兴奋剂,比赛成绩取消,并且禁赛两年。”

  美好的梦境被现实击打成碎片,毫不留情。

  赵黄昏百口莫辩,之后,教练也因为不信任赵黄昏提出和他分手,他被国家队开除,当天被骂上热搜,舆论酵之后愈演愈烈,逐渐变成网络暴力。

  “这种给华国丢脸的垃圾就应该去死!”

  “老天啊,这种货色也能进国家队?”

  “国乒垃圾赵黄昏退出国家队!国乒垃圾赵黄昏退出国家队!”

  赵黄昏咬牙忍了两年。

  两年后,他恢复比赛资格,抱着他最后的希望重向国家队递交了申请,然而这一次,他从那些曾经围在他身边的队友的眼里,看到的只有冰冷的审视和无尽的嘲讽。

  只有王俊朗还会对他露出笑脸。

  王俊朗笑着跟他说:“黄昏,我和教练在一起了,你会祝福我们吧?”

  空荡荡的训练室里,赵黄昏看到王俊朗和他曾经喜欢的人站在一起,笑容甜蜜,看起来非常登对。

  国家队理所当然地拒绝接纳一个服用过兴奋剂的垃圾。

  他什么都没了。

  他的队友,他的爱情,他的梦想,他的人生。

  他绝望地从体育场走出来,阳光下四肢都像浸在水里一样凉。他伸手敲了敲心脏。

  里面是空的。

  2o19年7月29日凌晨5点23分。

  赵黄昏终于经受不住接踵而来的打击,在浴室里,选择了用一瓶安眠药结束了他年轻的生命。

  ——那仿佛是咬碎了牙齿,混合血泪传来的声音。

  ——“我不甘心。”

  ——“谁能帮帮我。”

  ——“谁能帮我……”

  赵镇鹤猛地睁开眼睛。

  耳边,赵黄昏死前不甘的声音还没散去,虚空之中,一个微微跳动的机械声随之响起。

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