第33页（第1页）
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于是……在小师叔欲求不满的情绪中，他无辜炮灰了。小师叔一声令下：来人。右护法不知从哪冒了出来。小师叔一指左护法：这么久还没搞定，我都替你觉得丢脸。右护法讪笑：循序渐进嘛，循序渐进。小师叔白眼：循序渐进？这种事难道不该扑上去先压倒再表白，生米煮熟饭？右护法抽搐笑：这个……个人有个人的方法，我这么直接上了他会别扭得坚决不同意的。小师叔恨铁不成钢：你就不能上到他同意吗？！原来我以为需要春药的他，原来需要春药的是你！干脆把你们喂了春药直接关小黑屋算了！外面俩人脸爆红。左护法呆愣了几秒，捂着内牛满面的脸逃走了。然后……当晚左护法果然是痛快死的。次日早晨，左护法手持打鸳棒追着右护法跑了半个魔教，然后体力不支栽倒在地。右护法抱着左护法温柔道：我已经等很久了，不想再等了。周围教众一片起哄声。左护法嫩脸丢尽羞愤欲死。这一对的关系在魔教人尽皆知，迅速冲出魔教传遍武林。&ldo;喂，听说没，魔教左右护法是一对啊。&rdo;&ldo;哦，这不是经典西皮么？&rdo;&ldo;经典什么啊，这种西皮不都是一个暗恋另一个移情别恋么？&rdo;&ldo;狗血永远不嫌多。&rdo;&ldo;那倒是。&rdo;……很久以后，左护法达到可以在晚上力抗小师叔的声波攻击的段次了，原因是他已经叫得比小师叔大声了……有天左护法问起右护法：你为什么突然喜欢男人了？右护法默默扭头道：我原来就喜欢男人啊。左护法：胡说，你明明已经喜欢女人的，为什么突然这么高调到处勾搭？！（空气中浮现一种熟悉的酸味……）右护法：我不这样你才不会理会我呢。左护法：……啥右护法默默扭头：不，当我啥都没说。左护法：招，不招月钱扣光！右护法：亲爱的，每个月的月钱我都上缴的啊。左护法：……哼，妨碍我罚款的乐趣。乱七八糟琐事的花絮，日常生活什么的最喜欢了（番外）这天神医和太医在睡懒觉。原因嘛，自然是前个晚上闹腾太晚了。&ldo;神医，神医救命啊，我爹他不行了！&rdo;山下的村民大清早就来骚扰，神医哼哼了一声，翻身抱着太医继续睡。&ldo;师兄，救人，救人要紧啊。&rdo;太医一激灵就醒了，急急忙忙准备起身。&ldo;再睡一会。&rdo;神医的声音里还带着浓浓的鼻音。&ldo;我不能见死不救。&rdo;太医觉得自己的圣母之心再度被激发了，激动地说，&ldo;师兄你也是，身为神医怎可以不悬壶济世有违师傅教诲。&rdo;&ldo;那老妖孽有教我们医道么？&rdo;神医翻了个白眼把太医按在床上，&ldo;我让你睡着，我去。&rdo;说完皱着一张俊脸老大不乐意地起来穿衣服，跟着村民走了。太医呆呆地躺在床上，忽然忍不住笑了。师兄他真的是变了啊，以前他是怎么也不会理会的。中午神医回来了，带了点吃的。&ldo;师兄。&rdo;太医谄媚地笑了笑，&ldo;你最近越来越良民了。&rdo;神医白了他一眼：&ldo;我不去你也会去，还是我去吧。&rdo;说完在太医腰间掐了一把，&ldo;还疼么？&rdo;太医脸红了，拼命摇头。&ldo;那晚上继续。&rdo;&ldo;喂……&rdo;其他：看到悲剧取名相关帖笑倒，来段ko教主：为什么，为什么你要如此滥交？师傅痛苦扭头：都是老爹老娘的错。教主：……师傅：我爹姓任。教主：……师傅：而我娘为我取名君爽……教主一口狗血飚出，从此一蹶不振。神医什么都好，就是嘴巴毒，神医什么都好，就是重症颜控，神医什么都好，就是字写得难看……以上是废话。江湖上人人知道神医的名字叫做阎王见。人人都说他这名取得贴切啊，冷面腹黑毒舌刻薄，外加心肠硬，说不救就不救。曾经有人恨他入骨，为了动静小影响大地闹一场，该人趁着夜黑风高一个人孤零零带着白绫三尺静悄悄地吊死在神医家门前大树的东南枝上，次日神医出门，发现自家门前东南枝上有一人，神医让家里的下人牵来名犬旺财，拍拍它的脑袋说道：旺财，今天加餐，有肉吃。于是旺财欢快地饱餐了一顿。
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