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她的脸色变了变,只是片刻,她又恢复了原先的漫不经心和慵懒:&ldo;那你说,我应该怎么办?&rdo;她的语调渐渐变冷,&ldo;再一次追到英国去,再一次诱惑他,感动他,等待他的垂青,然后,费尽千辛万苦,终于有一天,可以过上贫贱夫妻百事哀的生活?&rdo;她从随身的坤包里掏出一支烟燃上,徐徐吐了一个烟圈,&ldo;俞桑筱,你是不是过于天真了?你觉得我做出这么大的牺牲值得么?&rdo;我冷冷地:&ldo;你不是爱他么?&rdo;&ldo;爱?&rdo;她微笑,渐渐地,她的笑容越来越漂浮,越来越虚幻,&ldo;是啊,如果我不爱他,十六岁那年,何必每到那天就穿上自认为最漂亮的衣服,忐忑不安地希望他在?他动手术,我何必飞到英国,衣不解带夜夜守在他c黄前,听着他的每一次呼吸等待他醒来?……&rdo;她出神般顿住,直到烟头燃到她的指尖,她打开车窗,轻轻一弹,呼啸的风声穿越我的耳膜。&ldo;可是,那又能怎么样?不爱,所以不珍惜。他从未珍惜。&rdo;&ldo;俞家人走的走散的散,只有我还稳稳站在这儿。爷爷奶奶骂我狼心狗肺,说我白白给敌人卖命,两个叔叔对我嗤之以鼻,笑我痴人说梦,妈妈劝我一道出国,虽然家业没了,过后半辈子的钱还不缺,可是,我俞桑瞳从小到大就没得过第二名,从小到大,俞桑瞳就应该就只能站在万人瞩目的舞台中央。龙斐陌一宣布娶你,我顷刻成为大家口中的笑柄和茶余饭后的谈资,那些女人们旁敲侧击拼命挖苦我,有什么关系?龙斐陌处处钳制我,在我身边布满了耳目和亲信,有什么关系?俞氏一倒,多的是人争先恐后来踩,又有什么关系?从来这个世上,比的就是谁能忍到最后。&rdo;&ldo;我可以从头学起,从信息源,到发布,到传播方式,所有的,一切的,以前我没有时间,没有兴趣,觉得没有必要的,我统统开始学。&rdo;她又点起一支烟,我这才发现,她的指尖微微泛黄,&ldo;以前我不喝酒,现在一个星期至少五天,我都在酒桌上陪客,以前我不抽烟,现在我几乎天天一包,以前我极其鄙视凭借美色而上位的女人,现在……&rdo;她的脸孔渐渐逼近我,市区已到,我停车靠边,坐着回视她,良久之后,她轻轻一笑:&ldo;桑筱,哦不,龙太太,我应该感谢你吗?为我谋得一个稍纵即逝的机会,而凭着它,我终于可以得到我想要的一切,只要我愿意,还可以得到更多,而我曾经做过的牺牲,跟它相比,又算得了什么呢?&rdo;她推门下车,在转身的一瞬间,淡淡地:&ldo;我知道你根本不会在乎,你从来都安于现状得过且过,可是等着吧桑筱,总有一天,我会把失去的,一点一点,全部都拿回来。&rdo;她朝前走去。我踩下油门,驶向一个完全相反的方向。一个ròu团团的小不点儿扑进了我的怀里,娇嫩嫩地:&ldo;干――妈――&rdo;我的眼睛顿时不争气地眯成一条线,自动自发地弯腰从抽屉里拿出早就准备好的东西:话梅,牛ròu干,巧克力,开心果……:&ldo;兜兜,今天怎么有空来看干妈?&rdo;一岁半,扎着小辫儿,背着蜡笔小新背包,走路还有点晃啊晃的小妮子忙不迭地抓起桌上的东西往嘴里塞,一边满足地眯起眼,一边奶声奶气地:&ldo;想干妈。&rdo;呵呵,想我抽屉里的东西更多些吧。我厚道地作出陶醉的模样,狠狠亲了她一口。赵兜兜小姐,黄晓慧女士速战速决生下来的宝贝女儿是也,聪明伶俐,狡猾无比,就连一向跟小孩无缘的龙斐陌都有点喜欢她。我是她干妈,虽然有点黯然神伤但仍捐弃前嫌握手言和的老总是她干爸。唉,多么混乱的辈份。她扑闪着大眼睛,臭美地:&ldo;干妈,把我的包包拿下来,会弄乱我的头发。&rdo;我翻翻白眼:&ldo;遵命。&rdo;她继续对我拼命放电:&ldo;干妈,帮我把包包打开。&rdo;咦,支使我上瘾啦?我刚想摆出长辈应有的尊严,她又开始色诱我:&ldo;妈妈说,里面好东西喔,不过,&rdo;她一边津津有味地吃着pokey慕斯巧克力棒,一边含混不清地,&ldo;她说不敢给你。&rdo;哦?我的胃口被吊得高高的,我朝不远处看上去很忙碌,始终脸不朝这边的黄晓慧盯了又盯,鼻子里哼了数声。能教出这么狡猾的女儿,本身道行该有多深!我不假思索打开,里面躺着两张纸。我拈起来看,看了又看,随即不动声色地放了进去。

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