第六十三章(第1页)
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灶火燃烧着,思月把一盘包子放锅里,倪学新合上盖子,她双手举过头顶做了个长长的拉伸,放松道:“终于下锅了,咱等着吃吧。”
倪学新看着她清洁灶台,温柔贤淑,他心里甜甜的,心底里的话像雨后的蚯蚓一样钻了出来,“思月,趁现在有时间,我想和你谈谈。”
“好啊。”
思月已预感今天绕不开这话题,她答应过倪学新会好好考虑,在回程西石的车上甚至产生过动摇。可是直到那天申先生因心情不佳过来找她,两人一起上山,在点滴的相处中,她确认自己对申先生的感觉还是很强烈,那一刻她明白了自己心里已经装不下其他人了。倪学新心里还是有小期待的,思月一直没有谈恋爱,身边也只有他自己一个追求者,加上与思月的家人同学朋友已建立良好关系,这么多因素综合下来,他觉得这次没有理由不成功。他柔声问:“上次你返回西石时我跟你提过的事,你考虑得怎样了?”
思月停下来,抬头看着这位老同学,脑子浮现出一群小朋友在老街玩耍的情景,他们认识有二十年了,对他的感觉更像是兄弟姐妹。她知道他的心意,但她真的无能为力。她诚恳望着倪学新,情真意切道:“学新,我很感谢你,这次我支教你帮了我很多大忙,一直忙里忙外,我无以为报,除了说谢谢,不知道能为你做些什么。你如果有需要我帮忙的地方,我一定尽我能力去做。我知道你对我的心意,可我,可我不能接受,对不起。”
他眼睛暗了下去,心里隐隐作痛,“为什么?我哪里做得不好?”
思月连忙安慰他,“学新,你没有做得不好,你做得很好。其实是我的问题,不关你的事。”
“是你的问题?是你对我没有感觉?”
他追问。尽管会伤害到他的自尊心,她还是坦白:“我对你没那种感觉,对不起学新。”
倪学新垂下头,“没关系,这种事情不能勉强的。”
思月内疚道:“我应该早跟你说的,但又怕伤害到你。”
“我明白,没事的。”
他了解思月的性格,一点也没怪她。思月没有出声了,让他自己慢慢消化。从小就认识的小伙伴,在她远在异地的时候,替她照顾父母,又来到她支教的地方悉心陪伴。只是爱情并不认可努力,思月也不想为了报答而违背自己的內心。“思月,你已有了喜欢的人吗?”
倪学新冷不防问一句,他眼里没有不甘,没有怨恨,而是充满真诚。她不想欺骗他,“嗯。”
他想求证,轻声问:“是申文亮吗?”
思月双手不安的搓着抹布,没有回答。这是她藏在心底的秘密,她并不愿意与人讨论自己的感情事。倪学新读懂了她的表现,他替她回答:“是他。”
此时他反而觉得轻松了些,“他的确不错,事业有成,是个人物。不过,论相貌他没我帅。”
他给自己来了个台阶,最后一句的转折也给自己些自信。思月心里都明白,她很感激学新的大度,“谢谢你。”
“我饿了,包子蒸好没?谁说还有烤红薯的?在哪儿呢?”
他拍着肚子问。“快了,帮忙拿一下碗筷。”
倪学新转身的时候,偷偷长叹一声,暗恋与失恋无缝对接,值得大吃一顿。包子和烤红薯都端上来了,倪学新临时过来,思月没什么准备,翻找食材后再炒了一盘冬瓜腊肉。从他第一次来吵着要吃走地鸡、五花肉,好像没一次能吃上,反而他为孩子们带来书包文具,为村民们无偿普及法律知识、提供专业意见,不计回报。思月把菜都推到他面前,“饿了,多吃点。这次的红薯特别甜,快尝尝!”倪学新确实化悲痛为食量,大口大口地吃着,毫不客气,一边吃一边点评:“我包包子的确实有天赋,思月你第二次做包子如此成功,有八成功劳在我的手艺上。”
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