第53章(第1页)
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我僵在原地,想推开又不忍心,不推开又觉得奇怪,耳边只有自己加速了的心跳声,让我说不出一个字。
“杨周雪。”
“嗯。”
“你跟太子的婚约……”我犹犹豫豫地提了一句,不确定她会有什么反应。
“你还在意这个呢?”她的语气很轻松地笑了一下,就是额头依旧抵住我的肩膀不移动分毫,“我当时知道的时候,皇上就差正式下旨了,父亲说我年纪太小,只怕承受不住这么深厚的福泽,但是我只怕夜长梦多。”
“当时不冷吗?”
杨周雪闷声笑:“冷啊,快冷死了,我都没敢往袖子里塞汤婆子。头磕在地上的时候还以为会磕出血,其实也就是疼,第二天烧到根本睁不开眼睛,不过皇上还是点了头。”
“你不怕太子针对你?”
我感觉心里很闷,不知道是因为杨周雪的行为还是她年仅十一岁就能鼓起的勇气,也可能是我这一生都无法体验她所经历过的这一切——而这一切都是我原本要经历的。
我想象不出来十一岁的我面对这种事情会做出什么选择,十一岁的我还在谢氏的疯病和无望的未来中找不到活下去的方向而徘徊不定,哪有心思去关注雪地里残留过的拖拽痕迹?
“要是真的嫁给太子了,那才是最可怕的。”杨周雪道,“我不想在东宫里担惊受怕数年后又在不见天日的后宫里蹉跎一辈子。”
我无话可说,却也承认她说得对。
马车停了下来,忠叔在车外面道:“小姐,大小姐,下来吧。”
大门已经关了,忠叔打开侧门,示意我们从侧门进去。
杨周雪依旧走在前面,我跟着她,手不自觉地碰了一下被她抵了一路的左肩,那里还残留着一点余温,砰砰的心跳声依旧没有平缓下来,我不自觉地猜想杨周雪看过来的时候有没有感受到我的心跳。
行春居里已经挂起了灯笼,杨周雪就着烛光将书箱放下来,她坐在椅子上,看向我:“你饿不饿?”
我这才想到今天出了太多事,几乎没怎么吃饭:“你要叫照玉给你送吃的吗?”
我总觉得自己很奇怪,明明自己饿的难受却嘴硬地不肯承认,一定要说是杨周雪想吃。
好像这样就能坚持最无用的自尊一样。
杨周雪却没什么表示,她摇头,舒展开的眉眼间一派坦然,就好像我们是亲密无间的亲姐妹:“现在这么晚了,折腾他们也不太好,我听说后厨备着宵夜,我们俩偷偷过去,你给我煮一碗汤圆吧。”
“为什么是我?”
杨周雪笑眯眯的:“这不是姐姐应该做的事吗?”
平时没听她叫我几声姐姐,这个时候就开始叫了,我有点无奈,倒也答应了。
我跟着她走到亮着灯的后厨,她踮着脚从窗户缝外往里看去,回头朝我展颜一笑:“没有人。”
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