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童在孤儿院里相依为命,那时候童年纪小,天天吵着要妈妈,他就耐着性子一遍一遍唱给他听。遥远的回忆让楼清羽沉默。他几乎已经快把上辈子的事情忘光了。有时候半夜惊醒,他都忍不住怀疑上一世只是他的一场梦。可是大梦醒来,前世残留的点点滴滴仍然萦绕在他的心底,让他始终与这个世界格格不入,有种不认同、不归属的疏离。迦罗炎夜并没有追问,沉默了片刻,忽然轻轻道:「我从来没有听过。」楼清羽顿了一瞬,明白了他的意思。迦罗炎夜于深宫中长大,蒋皇后不擅女道,照顾他的时间也不长。在皇太后那里,他更是没有得到多少关心,恐怕幼时从没有人轻轻拍着他的后背,唱着儿歌哄他入睡过。两人沉默着,气氛压抑的回到守灵的宅院。苍州的百鹿川是迦罗氏的发迹之地,立国之前迦罗氏的先祖都葬在这里。后来皇陵反复修葺,十分巍峨肃穆,远远看去,让人心生畏惧苍凉之感。虽然名为守孝实为发配,但该做的事情还是要做。马上就要到中秋,自然要准备祭祖的事宜。迦罗炎夜对这些事并不关心,反正也是做做样子,于是所有的事情都压在楼清羽身上。两人各做各的事,有时一天也碰不上一面,晚上即使同床共枕,也不再有任何亲密的行为。这种情况沈秀清和司锦等人看在眼里,暗暗着急,秋儿却毫无所觉。司锦看见他们俩一起骑马归来,十分高兴,迎上去道:「王爷,王妃,今天沈大人和秋儿去河边钓鱼,收获不错,晚上咱们吃鱼可好?」迦罗炎夜随意道:「好啊,就吃鱼吧。」秋儿嘿嘿一笑,想起什么,拽拽楼清羽的袖子,「少爷,咱们吃鱼,就吃那个吧。」「哪个?」「就是咱们在乡下时您做过的那种鱼啊!好久没吃了,好想吃啊。」「水煮鱼是吗?确实好久没吃了呢。」楼清羽笑笑,摸摸他的头,道:「你怎么就想着吃?念书如果也记性这么好就好了。」「少爷!」秋儿瞪眼。楼清羽哈哈一笑。他们主仆多年,感情深厚,与秋儿间言笑无忌,自有一种轻松的气氛笼罩。楼清羽一直视秋儿为亲人。他是他在这个世界睁开眼看到的第一个人,自然有特别的感情,这么多年来积累的东西,已经超越了真正的血缘,所以在秋儿面前,楼清羽是极为放松的。迦罗炎夜在旁看着,默不作声的将缰绳递给司锦。司锦看了一眼他的脸色,拉过秋儿道:「好了,别说了,快和我去厨房。再不收拾妥那些鱼,晚上你就别想吃了。」秋儿吐吐舌,乖乖的和司锦走了。楼清羽回头,见迦罗炎夜正默默望着他不知在想什么,微微一笑道:「晚上给你做道好菜,你会喜欢的。」迦罗炎夜从他身旁走过,淡淡地道:「随意。」楼清羽望着他的背影,心里生出无力疲惫之感。迦罗炎夜本就性子狠戾冷绝,楼清羽从不知道他在想什么、想做什么,就像他同样不了解他一样。在边境战场之时,二人同患难,共生死,终于走得近一点的关系,也于后来发生的波波折折中消磨殆尽。晚上司锦在院子中摆上酒席,沈秀清不知从哪里摸来两瓶陈年老酒,也一并摆在桌上。楼清羽不喜以身分压人,叫了沈秀清和司锦秋儿一起上桌,可沈秀清也就罢了,司锦和秋儿却无论如何不肯。秋儿对迦罗炎夜始终畏惧,楼清羽见状也不再勉强,让他们下去了。酒席过半,迦罗炎夜放下筷子,道:「我吃饱了,你们慢慢吃吧。」说完起身走了。沈秀清望着他的背影,叹息道:「你和王爷……这是怎么了?」「怎么了?」楼清羽晃晃酒杯,呵呵一笑:「我也不知道……」他突然吟道:「花间一壶酒,独酌无相亲。举杯邀明月,对影成三人。」他只吟了李白此诗的上半部。沈秀清听出了其中流露出的孤独和清冷,不由微微一震。诗是好诗,但这意境……「你会离开王爷吗?」沈秀清突然道。楼清羽微微一愕,哑然失笑:「你想太多了。」「我总觉得你并不属于这里……你会一直陪着他吗?」沈秀清凝视着他正色道。

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