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怀孕是件美妙而又神奇的事,她是那么敏感,可能是受精卵一着c黄,她就感觉到了。她吐得昏天黑地,在办公室不敢喝一口水,甚至听到同事喝水的声音,她都会作呕。他和她都是机关工作人员,虽然大家的观念不像从前那么陈腐,但是表面上的一些道德理念还是要恪守。他们还只是在恋爱,情浓之时,自然渴望亲密。他每次都有认真的避孕,意外又如何避免得了?这是美丽的意外。他两个月前被北京特警大队抽调过去,一个月回来一趟就不错了。他执行的任务总是危险而又艰难,她怕分他的心,通电话时不提怀孕的事,只撒娇说想他,很想很想。他说手中的任务一结束,他就回江州看她。很慢的时间在爬,如同在树下看树叶成长。在他回江州前十五天,她瘦了五斤,人都脱了相。同事都笑她是为相思瘦,她讪讪地笑。她很小心,没有任何人看出她怀孕了。他是晚上的火车,到江州时已凌晨一点。江州的初冬,天空中飘着细细的雪花。雪花从她的视线中划出无数道流痕。她伸手接住一片。雪花很容易动情,一伸手的距离他们便可以合二为一。她听到火车进站的声音,书上说怀孕前三个月是很危险的,动作不宜太猛。她静静地站着,等着他走过来。他看上去有点疲倦,但丝毫也不影响他的英朗与俊伟。那个小小的生命是男生还是女生?如果是男生,会有他这样的帅气么?她颤颤地伸出手,冰凉的指尖抚过他的脸颊,她说:&ldo;抱我!&rdo;他愣了一下,有些赫然地张开双臂,将她裹进怀中。旁边有人在吹口哨,还有人叫:快回家亲热去!回到公寓。她那间公寓挨着办公室,处处都是熟人,他在城郊另外租了一套设施齐备的公寓,两人都在江州,就会住这里。等他吃了饭、洗了澡,他走进卧室,看到她穿了件睡裙,挺着肚子,在镜子前转来转去。&ldo;很冷的!&rdo;他抱起她,把她塞进被窝中。&ldo;凌瀚……&rdo;她拉过他的手从睡裙下摆探进去。他亲亲她,揶揄道:&ldo;这么热情!&rdo;她羞红了脸,却没有笑。当他温厚的掌心覆住她的小腹,她问:&ldo;感觉到什么?&rdo;他的眼底有些发青,眼中布满血丝。他目不转睛看着她,神情突然大变:&ldo;你怀孕了?&rdo;语气不是惊喜,而是惊呆。陷在喜悦中的她,没有察觉,双手环抱住他的肩:&ldo;是的,你要做爸爸了。&rdo;她以为接下来他会很快决定领证,在肚子大起来前,把婚礼办了。一直以来,她所有的事,他都是这样安排得妥妥的。他一反常态,眉蹙得紧紧的,心情好像很沉重。&ldo;你不开心吗?&rdo;他笑得很勉强,&ldo;开心,但有许多事我要好好想想。&rdo;他吻了吻她的额头,替她把被角掖好,熄了灯。这一夜,他没有上c黄。早晨,她在阳台上看到一地的烟头。她没能吃早饭,强咽下去的一杯牛奶,也吐得精光。他站在洗手间前,看着裹在宽大棉衣里面的她,说:&ldo;钟荩,孕吐这么厉害,不如……暂时不要孩子吧!&rdo;她娇嗔道:&ldo;做妈妈哪那么容易,不过,这是甜蜜的折磨。&rdo;他叹口气,进去替她洗了脸。北京那边电话催得厉害,他在江州只呆了一晚,就走了,他对她说,他很快就回来。一周后,他回来了。这次任务似乎非常艰巨,他憔悴得厉害,也很少讲话。她晃着他的双手,笑着问:&ldo;凌队长,你准备怎么处置我们娘俩呀?&rdo;他叹气,&ldo;我们现在分居两地,经济也不那么宽裕,可能不能给孩子好的生长环境。钟荩,再等……两年吧!&rdo;这不像他讲的话,可又明明出自他的口,她难受了,&ldo;这是我们的孩子,是个小生命,你不要这样残忍。如果你不想要,你尽管告诉我,我……要!&rdo;他默默地看着她,然后走了。上了火车,给她发了短信,说他要慎重考虑。她有种不好的预感,仿佛有什么事发生,而她害怕知道。他的手机再也打不通,她每天强打精神去检察院上班,头晕恶心的感觉越来越厉害,四肢酸懒,她不得不请假在家休息。
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