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他以为她怕烦,沉吟了下,把车缓缓停在路边,&ldo;那你在车上坐会,我去给你买杯热饮。&rdo;她突地侧过身,狠狠地瞪着他,&ldo;韦彦杰,够了。不要再对我好,不然我会很恨你很恨你。&rdo;江冰洁走后,她突然从一朵温室里的小花成了一株无依无靠的糙。童大兵的忽视、钱燕的冷漠,十四五岁的时光里,心思慢慢地长,日子是那么的黯然无光,而彦杰却象她生命里的一盏明灯。在这盏明灯前,她不是钢铁侠,不是刘胡兰,她是彻彻底底的小叛徒,轻易地就投降了。可是当她化身成一只飞蛾,奋不顾身扑向那盏明灯时,灯灭了。在黑暗里摸索的日子里并不好过。不好过,也得咬着牙忍。如果时光可以倒流,再回到彦杰初来的那个夏日,她不会给他拿水,不会叫他哥,不会再要他一点一滴的好。不曾得到,也就永不会失去。车内的空气缄默得象一块寒冰。许久,彦杰轻轻吁了口气,发动引擎,谁也没有再说话。实中门口,接孩子的车排成了一条长龙,雷克萨斯不好过去,她就在路对面下了车。&ldo;哥,再见!&rdo;她又是他乖巧体贴的小悦,好象刚才那番厉言嫉色的人不是她。彦杰默默地看着她走远,伸手从裤袋里拿出一支烟,点上,一口一口地吐着烟雾。不知什么时候,雪已经停了。到班上转了一圈,收拾了笔记本,童悦开车回家,眼角跳跳的,大概是睡少了。下车时,下意识地抬了下头,叶少宁回来了,窗户里透出柠檬黄的柔光。她刚出电梯,门就开了,叶少宁一身舒适的家居装,头发湿湿的向后梳着,显然已洗过澡。屋子里开着空调,暖暖的气息湿润了童悦的心。&ldo;晚上在哪里吃的?&rdo;她边脱大衣边问。&ldo;在工地上。&rdo;&ldo;那我再给你做点面。&rdo;她挽起袖子走向厨房。&ldo;不要了,来,我们说几句话。&rdo;他牵着她的手走向沙发。电视开着,《探索》频道,不知在讲太平洋里的哪座海岛,神秘而又诡异。&ldo;郑校长今天有没找你?&rdo;双手搭在她的腰间,发觉腰好象比前些日子又细了些,再往上面,下巴瘦得发尖。高三的老师真是不易做。&ldo;嗯。&rdo;&ldo;你同意我的建议吗?童悦,疲累一天回家,面对一屋子的冰冷。以前一个人不觉着什么,现在我们结婚了,就不能接受了。其实我更想让你换份工作,如果没有合适的,在家待着也可以,我会赚钱。嗯?&rdo;他的语气是怜惜的、不舍的,却也是不容商量的。童悦喉间一滞,嘴里一阵一阵的苦,&ldo;少宁,我读了那么多年的书,不是为了做个家庭妇女的。我知道家里不差我这几个钱,但我想有属于我自己的人生,有我的生活圈子、朋友、同事。&rdo;他沉默了会,又平和地开了口,&ldo;那就不要做班主任,送走这届高三,以后只接高一的课。这样可以了吗?&rdo;似乎,他让了很大一步。&ldo;中途换班主任不太好,今年只能坚持到底。明年秋学期……&rdo;&ldo;你就这么敬业吗?是为了你崇高的职业道德,还是因为某个人?&rdo;他站起身,冷冰冰地看着她。他说他疲累了一天,她这一天不也是打仗一般。昨晚他吐成那样,她洗刷到凌晨,上c黄也只是合了下眼,就起c黄熬粥。她真的非常非常努力。她怔怔地迎视着他,以一种难解的表情。她深深地吸了口气,自嘲地弯起嘴角,&ldo;少宁,在你的心里面,是不是你也认为,我们的婚姻里,是我高攀了你?&rdo;他皱眉,&ldo;你这是什么念头?&rdo;&ldo;我一直都自以为我是个称职的、有责任的老师,你不能肯定,至少应该尊重我的工作。你不喜欢我的工作,不喜欢我的同事,你刚认识我的家人,谈不上喜欢不喜欢。我现在想,我凭哪一点让你许下一辈子的承诺?你希望我成为你的附属物吗?如果是这样,我不见得是合适的人选……&rdo;她有点激动,按住心口仰起头,眨了眨眼,&ldo;我站在这儿,是因为你温和、体贴。为你做某一件事,我都觉着温馨、甜蜜……&rdo;语调轻轻地颤栗了下,她捂住嘴,咬了咬唇,起身,去衣架上把刚拿下的大衣复又穿上。
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