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&ldo;是公子小白,请连名带姓一起叫。&rdo;小白抗议道。(这不是……齐桓公的名字么)&ldo;才不要,多没爱。就这么定了。&rdo;子苍露出女王架势,一锤定音。子非再次怜悯地看着小白,然后装作没有看见它充满期待的眼神。(小白:你这个妻管严。)(子非:要真是我老婆我也认了……)我是冒雨回家的有爱分界线回到茅庐时天已经黑透了,因为一大一小两只&ldo;狐狸&rdo;都淋湿了,子非只好像烧火丫头一样去烧热水。两只狐狸也跟到厨房凑热闹。&ldo;小白,你想吃什么尽管说,我让子非做给你吃。&rdo;大狐狸蹲在一旁对小狐狸说。&ldo;哎呀,这多不好意思。&rdo;小狐狸做害羞状。&ldo;……&rdo;子非:你当我是你家庖厨么?&ldo;没事,我也再吃一点当点心。&rdo;大狐狸笑眯眯地说。子非:没喂饱你真是我的不对。(薄暮:子非啊,哀家怎么觉得你有点欲求不满?)&ldo;红烧鸡翅、油煎鸡翅、香酥鸡翅……&rdo;小狐狸林林总总报出十几种鸡类菜肴,子非脑后挂的黑线越来越多。&ldo;真不好意思,这里只有素菜。&rdo;子非一边扔柴禾一边冷声说。&ldo;……&rdo;两只狐狸最后,放在两人面前的事两碗青菜面。&ldo;落差真大。&rdo;小白长叹一声,用爪子拨拨碗。&ldo;又是素食。&rdo;子苍用筷子拨拨面。子非没理会二人,坐到一旁翻书去了。一双筷子伸了过来,把青菜丢进了子苍的碗中。等等,筷子?狐狸会用筷子?子苍一转头,发现身边坐的不是一只蹲在椅子上的狐狸,而是一个和他差不多年纪的白发少年,他转过脸来嫣然一笑,又丢了一根青菜过来。&ldo;你知道狐狸不大喜欢青菜,白子也不例外。&rdo;白发美人冲他抛媚眼。呃,如果他的眼睛不是红色的会更有魅力一点。末了再感叹一句,狐妖的血统还真……基因优良。好在某只应变能力不错,其实用神经粗壮来形容更贴切些,居然还点点头表示赞同。&ldo;子非~~~~&rdo;子苍拉长了声音叫坐在一旁看书的子非。子非头也不抬地应了一声。一筷子绿油油的东西伸到了他的嘴边,是青菜。&ldo;啊‐‐张嘴,我来喂你。&rdo;子苍哄他吃。子非瞥了他一眼,又看了看青菜,还是吃了。于是某人顺利地把菜叶子都喂给了做面的人。&ldo;感情真好,啧啧。&rdo;一边吸面条一边发表言论的小白不慎呛入了面条,狂咳不止,喷得满桌都是。&ldo;……你擦桌子。&rdo;子非看着一桌狼藉,寒声道。&ldo;子非大人我错了……&rdo;小白作忏悔状,眼泪在眼眶里滚来滚去,可惜,这招用错了对象。子非没理会他的必杀技,凉凉地说:&ldo;还有碗。&rdo;子苍在一旁偷笑,除了他之外,惹到子非的人可是没有一个有好下场的,小白,回去记得上香啊。小白含嗔带怨地一瞪,端起碗一跛一跛地乖乖洗碗去了。看美人洗碗果然令人心情愉快啊。魔镜(eg)薄暮冰轮:好吧,哀家来恶搞了。话说此乃天气晴好的一个傍晚,子非与子苍回到家,子非同学又义不容辞地下厨做饭,子苍同学洗干净手准备开吃。可是哲学告诉我们,事物是具有前进性和曲折性的,前途是光明的道路是曲折的,所以我们的子苍同学注定是吃得到饭的但也注定要付出代价的。子非抽出手,将一个空瓶子递上:&ldo;去,打点酱油回来。&rdo;某只正在垂涎饭菜准备伸出罪恶之爪的饿猫在酱油瓶与香喷喷的饭菜间痛苦挣扎许久,说道:&ldo;子非,我要是能早点遇见你该多好。&rdo;多门煽情的话啊,可惜对象是素来以严谨严肃著称的子非。放盐都会算温度对盐那可以忽略不计的溶解度变化进行计算的某人显然是无效的。&ldo;嗯?&rdo;果然,某人只是略带疑惑地哼了一声。&ldo;那样也许我们的儿子已经会打酱油了。&rdo;子苍说完,拎着酱油瓶夺门而出。果然,一息之后,一把锃亮的菜刀飞出厨房,钉入门外石壁达一指深。高手啊高手。子苍围着菜刀转了两圈,寻思是不是该开班收徒教授独门暗器‐‐菜刀。多拉风啊,什么小李飞刀、孔雀翎的哪里比得上菜刀的强悍无敌啊,而且做工方便随处可取。

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