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但她的回答伤透佐弥的心。&ldo;你让我觉得恶心。&rdo;她居然这样说。佐弥是因她而出现的,佐弥也只会因她而哭泣。我们一直都是没人要的小孩,只能扶持着彼此慢慢走过来。唯一对我们的只有大哥,大哥对我们最好了。还有阿翔。我前阵子才知道,原来他跟我同年呢!所以我也决定对他好一点……○月○日,天气阴。……他们两个简直是恩爱过头,蛋包饭上面每次都用蕃茄酱画上爱心,我鸡皮疙瘩掉一地了啦……○月○日,天气阴。……今天很开心,大哥陪我玩了我最爱自由落体。最后的一餐是在麦当劳里面,大哥帮我点了个双层牛肉汉堡,我本来想努力把老吃完的,但是好象快来不及了,我发现自己软软的像开始融化的奶昔,所以决定先写日记。我走了以后,完成最后的一道融合,那我们就能变回我了。虽然医生说融合的过程不会痛,但我还是有点害怕。卵走了以后曾经存在的我会到哪里去呢?我们变成了我以后,我喜欢大哥的心情会不会消失呢?我希望阿满能够代替我多喜欢大哥一点,但是瞧他这模样,我在写日记的时候他还老是抬起头来去看他的阿翔,然后两个人笑得快乐又暧昧地,完全不理会大哥的存在。哼,真是嫉妒死人了。我也想要跟大哥这样啦……日记最后一页结束在这个地方,我跳得疼痛莫名的心脏也几乎要随之停止勃动。即便是对草莓所叙述的情境没有丝毫印象,但心底的某个地方却似乎能将文字转化成景象,让鲜明的场景浮现脑海。对养父的恨意、良智一直以来像针刺的冷漠、我最深爱的婉婉和奈奈、还有魏翔的笑容……我认为自己从头到尾都是爱着婉婉的,而婉婉替我生了奈奈。但日记结束以前所记录的事情却令我感觉事实或许不是那么一回事。草莓证明我是喜欢魏翔的,既然如此,我怎么可能再去爱上婉婉?除非我变了心。她消失以后到奈奈出生之前的这段时间是最重要的关键,我想我得弄明白到底发生了什么事情。良智会知道吗?也许我该问问她。因为奈奈出生那段时间婉婉很虚弱,良智曾经搬来和我们同住过。我又想起大哥曾说草莓有写信给他,我想我也得找时间去跟大哥问清楚。三楼乒乒乓乓地,传来小丫头的叫声。她尖笑不停地叫爸爸,从楼上叫到了楼下。&ldo;爸爸,你看我的头发。&rdo;奈奈开心地摇头晃脑,将她美美的长发甩过来又甩过去。&ldo;直的耶,好直好直,还好软好软。&rdo;她大笑着跳来跳去,转起圈圈来。魏翔也被吵醒,他跟在奈奈的身后扶着楼梯把手慢慢走下来。他的背还没好,一手撑着,眉毛也拧着,脸色仍然有些白。&ldo;宝贝过来。&rdo;我朝奈奈招招手。奈奈冲进我怀里,膝盖还撞着我的胃,让我狠狠地痛了一下。我叹了口气轻轻地抱抱她,在她粉嫩的苹果脸上亲了亲。&ldo;爸爸好爱妳,奈奈爱不爱爸爸?&rdo;一想到她可能不是我的亲生女儿,而是养父和婉婉乱伦生下的,我就感到心痛。我明明这么疼她,为什么老天要这么捉弄我。&ldo;奈奈也好爱爸爸,好爱好爱。&rdo;她拼命地往我脸颊上亲,弄得我的脸都是她的口水。我窝心地笑了,心里头又痛又甜。跟着放下小家伙,任她在客厅里疯子似地跑来跑去,头发甩的像鬼一样把脸全部遮住,这回我没有制止她的行为。难得看她这么开心,就算了吧!&ldo;早安。&rdo;魏翔在我身旁沙发上坐下。&ldo;早。&rdo;我打开电视,转到新闻台。&ldo;我也想亲你,然后跟你说我好爱好爱你。&rdo;他将头枕在我肩膀上。&ldo;我女儿会看到。&rdo;我把他的鸟窝头移开,但是没两秒他又躺回来。&ldo;对了,既然自己作设计师的,你干嘛不把头发也弄直,省得整天翘这里翘那里,乱七八糟的。&rdo;我瞧奈奈的头发作的不错。&ldo;我怕你回来会不认得我,这几年来一直祈祷自己不要变得太多不要长得太高,哪知道就算我还是十五岁的样子,你也不会记得我,你早就把我忘光了。&rdo;他淡淡地说着,手掌攫住我,玩起了我的手指来。&ldo;如果你不喜欢我的头发,我等一下就叫同事帮我弄直。&rdo;他说。
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