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‐‐哥哥应该没什么事,不然哪会有心情畅想这些东西?&ldo;加什么油,你别想置身事外。&rdo;叶瑾照旧数落了他一句,又专注的低头研究起来。叶谦不再讲话,只是默默祈祷,祈祷自己恐怖的胡思乱想赶快被现实否决。却不想,命运的灰色乐趣就是将人用力堆积起的希望瞬间打破_____________________________________________初次化疗比想象中的更难受。叶瑾强忍着恶心和无力开车回家时,天都黑了。到了家门,又恨忐忑,抬眸在后视镜照了照,用力将嘴唇抿出点血色,才重新带上淡定的面具,鼓起勇气去面对大房子里必须面对的人。_____________________________________________&ldo;小谦,等我吃晚饭呢吗?&rdo;叶瑾寻到卧室,见里面黑漆漆的,便在门口打开灯问道。传闻从公司回来就闷在屋子里的叶谦正于床上趴着,好似在睡觉。沉默凝滞两秒,他才声音低哑的回答:&ldo;嗯。&rdo;叶瑾走近笑了笑:&ldo;别睡了,起来洗个脸,饭马上准备好,你昨天不说想吃椰汁鸡汤了?我特意约了个新厨师来试菜。&rdo;&ldo;干吗去了……&rdo;叶谦一动不动,只是这样问。&ldo;不是说见个朋友吗?喝了两杯咖啡。&rdo;叶瑾回答。叶谦动了动脑袋:&ldo;好喝吗?&rdo;叶瑾被问得非常疑惑,俯身去扶他的肩膀:&ldo;什么好喝不好喝的,怎么了?&rdo;一声哽咽突兀的响起。&ldo;怎么了,出什么事了?&rdo;叶瑾紧张的又扯又抱,终于将紧抓着床单的弟弟弄起来,看到他哭的一塌糊涂的脸,担心的要命。叶谦性子比谁都倔,此刻却哭的像个软弱的孩子,被问过之后眼泪流的更汹涌,将精致的睫毛湿到狼狈。&ldo;谁气你了?爸妈打电话来了?&rdo;叶瑾有些后悔,早知道就把化疗的破事拖一拖,不把弟弟自己扔下。&ldo;你把我当什么了!&rdo;叶谦终于怒吼出来,使劲打他:&ldo;你他妈要死了都不告诉我!准备什么时候让我收尸!&rdo;叶瑾根本不晓得弟弟是怎么知道这件事的,心乱之余,本就恶心的胃被他粗鲁的动作弄得更难受,忍不住抬手干呕了几声。叶谦转瞬又吓得脸发白,边哭边发抖,扶着他说:&ldo;哥,我不是故意的,你哪里难受,你躺下吧……&rdo;叶瑾皱眉喝了口水,冷静下来道:&ldo;……真是瞒不过你,我没事,放心吧。&rdo;轻松的跟什么一样。叶谦却哭的像是自己得了绝症:&ldo;那怎么才叫有事?&rdo;&ldo;哎,你怎么这么傻,现在都什么年代了,病都治得好的,我不说就是怕你这样,你还真不争气。&rdo;叶瑾反倒成为付出安慰的人。叶谦根本不听他胡说,忽然就伸手抱住他哽咽着撕扯最后的幻想:&ldo;为什么会这样……为什么会是你……爸妈爷爷奶奶外公外婆都好好的……谁都没有这个病啊……是不是医生看错了……&rdo;&ldo;又不一定是遗传的,得了就治呗,别哭了,听话。&rdo;叶瑾手绢都擦脏了,接着换西服袖子擦,半晌之后又笑了:&ldo;还不知道你这么能哭。&rdo;说完,就亲了亲弟弟发颤的唇。叶谦没有反抗,眼神愣愣的忽然道:&ldo;你若是要死了,我们就一起死。&rdo;叶瑾皱眉:&ldo;别说傻话。&rdo;叶谦看着他温柔的眼睛,泪水又顺着脸滑落下来。_____________________________________________一直闹到晚上都没安宁。叶谦如临末日,等到时针过了午夜,仍旧没有睡着,缩在被子里面时不时还啜泣几声。眼睛哭肿了,眼泪也快哭干了,想必整个人都累极了。叶瑾被握着手,感到他依然不自觉的发抖,叹息道:&ldo;别这样好吗,别的事我都能处理,可是你这样我真不知道该怎么办,别让哥哥再操心,嗯?&rdo;&ldo;嗯。&rdo;叶谦很艰难才发出声音。他根本不记得今天是怎么离开医院的,当听到护士说是白血病时,真以为是自己的耳朵出了差错,从震惊、到恐惧、到绝望、到相信……这样沉重的心理过程,让任性的弟弟几乎瞬间长大。前二十几年所有的郁闷、所有的不满、所有的不如意顷刻全部不值一提。
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